Chemistry is often overrated. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying attraction isn’t important, but its not what makes a relationship last. I used to think that I needed that spark to connect with someone. Over time, I’ve learned to value common beliefs and mutual respect. I value partnership. I value someone who can encourage me when I’m down. I value someone who can grow together with me. Chemistry is definitely a factor, but its not a deciding one.
Filtering by Tag: Encouragement
1 Peter 4:8-And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.
This was yesterday's daily scripture. I started to think about divorce rates and came to the conclusion that we have been conditioned to quit. We don’t forgive. We don't give second chances. We quit. We get mad. We feel wronged, and we quit. Our love is circumstantial instead of unconditional. Our love is conditional. Our marriages are not based on devotion, but mutual convenience. We don't let love cover. We don’t love. We “like” strongly. Maybe we need to revisit the book of Peter to get a better understanding of the power of love. Real love covers.
I’m literally waiting with bated breath for the arrival of our daughter. This pregnancy has taught me that we are not in control. We have a sense of control, but not really. We can’t make ourselves breathe. We can’t make our heart pump. We can’t cause the sun to shine or the Earth to move. We can’t stop all nuisances in our life even if we wanted. Life is unpredictable. We can pray and try to move God. We can stomp our feet and have a tantrum. We can give up or we can choose to move forward. Still, we can’t control all the moving pieces of our lives. Woosah. Take a deep breath. Accept that life is unpredictable and that’s ok.
I don't think things catch me by surprise. I'm just disappointed when people do certain things, because I expect better. I want people to be better. I want people to do better. I asked God a long time ago to help me with this journey because for several seasons I had to walk alone. I experienced loss of relationships.
People I trusted, people I confided in turned their backs on me....because they were supposed to..they served their purpose. They were supposed to leave. They were supposed to hurt me. They were supposed to disappoint me. I would have never grown. I would have never left. I would have never taken the first step. I would have never moved. I would have never started this journey.
We all play our parts. Every good story has a villain. To be honest, I'm sure I have been a villain in someone else's story. I hurt people. I disappointed them. I did not live up to their expectations. Being both a victim and victor gives you divine perspective. You are but a prayer away from being on either side of the spectrum. It's the grace of God that keeps you.
There has been a new trend of telling stories from the villain's perspective. In most of these stories, the villains are humanized. Their actions are justifiable. We are able to empathize with them. So, if by chance you feel attacked or maybe you're the one doing the attacking recognize the motive. Sometimes, we act out of character when our motives shift. Motives are the underlying reason for our behavior...good or bad.
Life is full of distractions that make it very hard to focus. It seems like we get pulled in a million and one directions. Things fall apart at the same time. Kids start acting up. Money gets funny. Life happens. Truthfully, most of us focus on the problem. It’s easier to see than the solution. We focus on our fear. We focus on what’s going wrong instead of what’s going right. We have to condition ourselves to point out the positive. We have to teach ourselves to focus on God in the midst of chaos.