Beloved

Most of us just want to be loved. We want to feel like we matter to someone. We want to know that our presence means something to someone else. We want to know that when we leave, someone will miss us. Know that you are loved. You do matter. You are someone's beloved. There is someone who loves the sound of your laugh. There is someone who loves your smile. There is someone who loves just being in your presence. You are loved, beloved. 

Deliberate

I'm sure many people would debate whether or not love is a choice. I believe that it is not only a choice, but a deliberate, well-thought out choice. I think that love requires strategy, because there are many opponents of love. The statistics about divorce are enough for some to never consider marriage. The top 3 causes for divorce are sex, money, and communication. These are just a few of the opponents of love. About 50% of US marriages are remarried or re-coupled, which means a lot of them are blended families. Add children and jealous exes to the previous list. That's a lot of opposition. Love these days must be deliberate, otherwise you are setting yourself up for failure. Don't ignore red flags. Don't brush issues under the rug. Recognize when the relationship has gone past its expiration date. Be willing to compromise. Communication is key. And don't be afraid to seek out a third party mediator. We all need help sometimes. I am a big proponent for love. Let's be deliberate in who, why, and how we love. 

Destiny

"A person often meets his destiny on the road he took to avoid it."-Jean de La Fontaine

What are you avoiding? What have you been putting off? What do you know you are supposed to be doing, but haven't found the time to do yet? Is it starting that business? Is it that blog you were going to write? Do you want to go back to school? Is it that passport stamp? Is it that blind date you were supposed to go on? We are creatures of habit. We are procrastinators. We make excuses, and most times it is because of fear: Fear of the unknown. Fear of failure. Fear of success. Fear keeps up from our fate. Our fate is our destiny, and our destiny has a destination. It's up to you when you choose to arrive. 

Affection

Never underestimate the power of a kind word and a hug. Sometimes, all you need is a good bear hug. Ask any child, a kiss can heal any injury. Human contact is necessary and often neglected, despite the proven medicinal benefits. We are nurturers, and we need to be nurtured. Just admit it, we all need love and affection.

Faithful

I had a lot of positive and negative male influences growing up. I saw men do and say things that I didn't like. Interesting enough, I have more male friends, than I do female. However, the female friends I do have are close. They are about as diverse, different, and unique as they come. My male friends, too for that matter. I value all of my relationships because they are genuine, complicated, and transparent. We love each other. We love the good, the bad, and the ugly. I think relationships fail when we choose to not see people for who they really are. In fact, every relationship that I had where infidelity was issue; I knew. I saw the wandering eye. I ignored the extra flirtatious nature, because I believed that I was enough. Moment of Truth: You are enough for the right person. You never have to make someone be faithful. Either they value you, or they don't. The right person will not risk it all for a moment of temporal pleasure. The right person will commit. The right person will be worth the wait. The right person will be faithful to the end. 

Smitten

Do you remember when you used to slide a folded note to your crush with one question and a multiple choice answer? Check yes, no, or maybe so. You knew right then if the feelings were mutual. You knew if you should try a little harder or let it go. Childhood crushes were the best. Gone are the days of simplicity. Asking someone to prom is like a marriage proposal. Straight yes or no answers have become "its complicated." Do you remember when you didn't care about titles or status? You just enjoyed someone's company. He/She made you smile and that was enough. You were smitten. You didn't care to complicate things. You just enjoyed the moment. Get back to the fundamentals. Revisit square one. Enjoy the simple things. Doodle your names on a piece of paper. Draw your initials on a tree. Laugh really hard, and try not to blush. Enjoy just being smitten. 

This is only a test

I hated when my favorite show would be disrupted to test the emergency broadcast system. It was the most annoying sound, much like the dial tone when someone left the phone off the hook. I just dated myself because most people don't have house phones, but stick with me. Think amber alert meets tornado siren. Very annoying to say the least, but the point was clear. This is only a test. No need to panic, or be alarmed. Your regularly scheduled programming will return soon.

Don't you wish life had an emergency broadcast system? So, you wouldn't overreact to certain situations. You would know, "this is only a test." You would simply be patient and endure the minor inconvenience to your life. You wouldn't overthink it. You wouldn't wonder or worry. You would just wait because "this is only a test."  

So, you're still looking for a job. You're still waiting on Mr. or Mrs. Right. You're still waiting on that house or car. You're still waiting on that baby and that promotion. You're still waiting on things to go your way. Remember, this is just a test. A test of your patience. A test of your character.  A test of your integrity. A test of your resolve. A test of your faith. I assure you that your regularly scheduled programming will return sooner than you think.